Sales guy, are you?

Most orators are, well... just plain, lack-lustre monotones, few are inspiring, and then there are those who take you through moments of truth. This post revolves around Prof. V. K. Murti who teaches us a subject, which till date I thought was amongst the dry, dull and dreary topics – Distribution and Sales Management (DSM).

Few of us would want to remember a Friday the 13th. I would, for reasons completely different from what this day is attributed to. Having lazed the previous day and all of that morning, it was difficult to shake off the lethargy and gear up for the first session on DSM post-lunch. The first 2-3 rows were empty. Most of our professors are used to this sight. But he insisted we occupy each of those.

Marketing and Sales functions have always been uttered in the same breath but they never shared the same pedestal. Marketing conjures an image of devising strategies, venting your creativity and being the “brand-maker”. On the other hand, what meets the eye when you think of Sales is laborious work, remote areas and snappy customers. Marketing is envied while Sales is despised.

Most of them who have taken Marketing majors knew in their hearts that it wouldn’t be all that rosy. Then he mentioned Kotler; who is “gawd insaan” for most of us – and from that point on we were glued. Like a barbarian he would slay one myth after the other – that Kotler was written only from an FMCG perspective; that it never changed much since its first edition in 1964 (while the whole concept of marketing had undergone a radical change). He had nothing personal against Kotler I guess, but he was a man on mission, who wanted to put Sales where it belonged – as the only revenue generating department! Marketing, he says, is splurging money; but where will the “bloody” money come from?

A notable point about this professor is that he says what is; doesn’t try to be diplomatic. And this is exactly why all of us feel at home in his class; because he is not bothered about being politically correct. Some of his “bond” statements will always be remembered –

“Saala idhar kutta wafadaar nahi hai, insaan kaise wafadaar rahega?”

“Saara MBA ka gyaan, saari akad nikal jayegi..”

“MBA is the only course where you are allowed to use jargons without understanding anything about it”

“Consulting? Tum usko advice doge jisne industry mein pachhis saal kaam kiya hai? Arre you are barely twenty five..”

“What is the value proposition to your recruiters? Green campus..? Arre woh kya karega green campus ka?”

What he said pierced like an arrow at times, nevertheless it was the truth. He is a Brahmin, but thinks and does business like a Gujarati-Marwadi-Sindhi-Jew, all in one! And, indisputably, he is proud of it, as must any sales guy be!

Meet Omi....

I have tried 6 different things – cleaning my room, having soup, arranging the shelves, reading a book, doing some literature review (read: empirical study), analysing a case on transhipment for a competition – all in the past 15 minutes! Clearly, I am confused (what an oxymoron!). Eventually, I decided on the 7th activity, put an entry in my blog....

Let me introduce you to Omi. Omi is like you, well sort of. Omi tries to be everything to everybody; he battles with what he is and what he wants others to perceive him to be. Quite like yours, his problem is that he doesn’t know either of them. At times, he thinks why people try to bundle ten different people into themselves, all the while publicizing that they are unique. And more so, why does he do so. He knows for a fact that beneath the armour that he has built year after year around him, there is a man, who is much like anyone else; who wants money, who wants to come back to a beautiful family, who wants to enjoy every moment he is alive and at times cares a dime about anyone beyond his circle of love; someone who wants to live by own, simple rules which also include no rules at all.

Yet at several different times of the day, Omi is defending himself against all that he is. His sense of right and wrong slowly develops into There-Isn’t-Anything-Right-Or-Wrong. Things are gray. Suddenly, deeds do not define morality, intent does. Then, after a point, he begins to ponder over the true meaning of morality. And he shoves the thought aside like you would to a newspaper that has only bad news on the front page and looks away. He knows his defences are lowering when he says, “that’s what I truly believe in”; yet he saves it for the closing line of his debate. He chooses to ignore taking a stance on dubious events. These are signs of his armour melting, signs of him showing the real and simple him.

What is Omi doing right now, where is he? Is he writing a blog, is he reading this blog? Is he trying to shirk some reality bits from this too? Come out of the dissonance Omi and show up!! Show the world the REAL you, for you don’t really have to be the hero, the unique one or the chosen one; you just gotta be genuine and that works!

The specimens at Great Lakes

Yet another boring class.. I am convinced now that they are my only chance to update my blog (given the time crunch outside class). So, what do I write about today while trying to make sense out of this utter B.S. class on HR management? Umm... Why not describe each of the specimens (read friends) here?

Anirudh Kashyap (aka Ani/Kashy): "Cash to the right of me.." - this shall be his mantra five years from now. Amongst us he shall be the first one to become a millionaire. Unlike all other cases, this is one where he will not be slow or late. Will cry even if he gets a CGPA of 3.93!

Anil: No less than Ani, he is the other millionaire amongst us. He looks like Morpheus with his shades on and thinks I am an illiterate when it comes to music! Watch out for this guy when he is teaching for he is capable of flinging anything that comes handy - book, calci, ...!

Bennett (aka Ben/Benny): He is the "lambu" of our gang at 6 feet something. Funny, goofy and rated the cutest guy on campus (apparently) :P An unconventionally sweet fellow :)

Gaurav Gupta (aka GG): Meet GG; the guy with the best "timing". Knows exactly when to take a pot shot and exactly where to stop. A very lucky guy (the reason for which is the next person.. err.. specimen I shall introduce)

(Agri)-Maa or (Mag)-gie: She is the epitome of patience to put up with GG! Raat-keeda as I would like to call her, she can sleep all day but not at night. Extremely talented, this belle can dance so well, you cannot see anyone else but her when she is on stage. She forbids me from having more than 2 cups of coffee a day :(

Angad: He does not have a nickname. Why? Coz "Angad" defines Angad best. No adjectives can do him fair justice. TPZ, football fanatic are some words that go as his synonyms. "now it's like that eh?", "Copyright (make a 'C' with your thumb and fingers curled)", "talk to the hand"... all are his.. well... copyrights! Always glad when you introduce him to a new girl (but he needs no help with introduction). That's Angad.

Murugan (aka Muruga/Quickgun/Shotgun): The success of Quickgun (Murugan) on our campus should be clearly attributed to this guy. Oh Stu-kesh (coz he's the Stu Co/Student Coordinator)! Beckoned by all for everything; from getting their rooms cleaned to taking attendance in guest lectures. Anything and everything that does not fall within the scope of any other committee (or we simply can't find the right person) we holler for this guy.

Manika & Dhrity: I thought of writing about Manika, but I couldn't imagine her minus Dhrity :P. Both these girls are virtually bound! To the extent that they have also caught flu together!

But I'd might as well write about them separately :P.
So back to Manika (aka Mani): My partner in crime and our crime being SWIM. And boy! what a rocking time we had while SWIMming :) Just got to know her better during those days - that she should be left alone when she's flaring, but she's absolutely fine the next moment. half the people on campus are "max cute" and for the other half she wonders "yeh apne class mein hai??!!??"

Dhrity (aka DB/Dhut): Mandarin is her pet subject :D. This babe from Guwahati has broken (and shall break) several hearts on campus. Her standard response to this would be "Arre... thappad ekdum.. throw you on the road ekdum". BTW, it's an honour for me to share my birthday (literally) with this B-E-A-U-tiful girl. And I recently found out that I was to be named Dhruti! I am glad i wasn't.. it would have been some story on campus!

Aditi: "jaldi se garam roti le aao warna Aditi aa jayegi".. that's the canteen gossip :P. This girl has a mind of her own... don't even think of influencing her! The darling or "charming lady", may I say, of our faculty here; this girl will suddenly scream in class, laugh (out loud) and walk around at free will (the only other person who can dare to walk freely in class is Rajveer, the 'Straight F' teaching assistant. I can dedicate an entire blog to him!). But all said and done, she has the sweetest smile and if you ever want a frank opinion, she is the one to go to.

That's about some of the rare specimens I met here. You bet there are more. But as the lecture comes to an end, so does my post. Before anyone accuses me, I too am a part of this rare species; so people feel free to write about this specimen :)

A tale of two lectures

Earlier I had to find motivation to write a blog entry. Now it has become my motivation to stay awake in a class as boring as Market Research (after lunch!). On a bitchy note, this guy being unmarried is either the reason or consequence of him being boring.

This brings back memories from last evening. Before you jump to conclusions, I was in enviable company - A Harvard grad, witty, charismatic (no two ways on this one). The only flip side was his receding hairline and greying temples. Mr. Ashok Vasudevan, with his impeccable knowledge language skills and wit could connect with 260 odd people who are less than half his age! So enchanting was his lecture that it were full 75 minutes before I noticed the color of his trousers and that he wore a faded green colored T-shirt. The only other noticeable accessory on this highly uncommon commoner was his watch.

He spoke about entrepreneurship to young minds like ours. In gross contrast, he sounded like the youngest enthusiast amongst us when he spoke on his pet topic. That was one session, almost 150 minutes long (without a break), during which I did not even think of catching forty winks.

Such was his demeanour, that one amongst us when asked about Albert Einstein replied "Science GUY"! Yet another was baffled when simply asked his name. He talked straight, extremely in your face. Whether you like it or not... what is, is; and there are no two ways about it. If you think otherwise, you choose to conveniently frame that belief and hence frame yourself. That is the way he spoke about myths surrounding entrepreneurs and enterprises. He believes that one need not manipulate the bureaucracy while in business; those who believe so and do so choose to make peace with oneself the easier way. "The biggest enemy of truth is not the lie, but the myth."

At 20 and a bit more, I realize we have too much cynicism in our minds. Not something I chose but something I picked up on my way. With his powerful words uttered with conviction seen only in staunch believers, he shattered that barrier. He said, "Neither do you have that experience nor the reason to have developed such cynicism within you at this age." Amongst the many proponents of practice, this man comes and slaps on your face the importance of theory. Very simply put, he says, "Good theory is always practicable. That which is not is not good".

According to him, an entrepreneur must be the jack of all trades and the master of one. He must be able to talk to the vendor this minute negotiating prices and talk to the IT guy next; share a drink with his partner over lunch and rush to the shop floor for a quick chat with the operations guy. In sum, he is every one's guy - sometimes critiqued, sometimes stood by, at times appreciated, at times let down, often the weird fellow and more often the most creative! Just like our speaker who visited yesterday, Mr. Ashok Vasudevan, who vehemently defends the importance of this "pain-killer" within our society - the Entrepreneur.

Opportunity Cost

"Opportunity knocks just once"... and if you miss it, you incur an opportunity cost. Economics says, even if you do not, you will incur an opportunity cost.

Opportunity cost is the cost of making one choice out of the multitude available to you. The productive time that you miss while you sleep is also an opportunity cost! But indeed, this point is debatable. One could argue upon the essentiality of sleep. But since the 'gain' from both activities is different, we can categorically call it an opportunity cost.

To further complicate things, opportunity costs are incurred explicitly and implicitly. It is not unusual to incur explicit and implicit costs simultaneously. In my case, forgoing the salary I used to earn is an implicit opportunity cost (no cash flows). Whereas, choosing to pursue an MBA after quitting my job is an explicit opportunity cost (fees constitute the cash flow).

Let's say, you bought a ticket at $100 to watch the Roddick-Federer battle and I offerred to buy it from you at $150. But the diehard fan that you are, you decline my offer. So, net-net, how much has the ticket cost you - $100 or $150? In terms of cash flow, you have transacted a cash outflow of $100; but you also missed an opportunity of transacting a cash inflow of $150.

An accountant would say, it cost you $100. An economist would say, it cost you $150; $100 that you paid and $50 that you apparently lost.

Another dilemma that meets the eye (more than you would want it to) is comparing the tangible gain/loss to the intangible gain/loss. Taking an unpaid leave to enjoy a vacation at your dream location, with your better half .... Not all of us may be able to see sanity in this choice (depending upon how rational you are). Now... rational people think at a margin. And marginal gain/loss depends upon how much you 'value' the outcome of a decision; and the value per se might well be different for each one of us.

So, take-away from here is... let the opportunity costs RIP, because you may hardly ever end up getting positive returns - after all, the cost is all about missing something.. ain't it?

Kodai is b-e-a-u-tiful....

We got a couple of days off and my friends from college and I packed away from the sultry heat of Chennai to Kodaikanal - one of most picturesque hill stations I have seen! Needless to say, it was a welcome change from Chennai and Mahabs (Mahabalipuram) where we spend most of our weekends.

We started from Chennai with loads of enthusiasm only to find the “holiday special” inching its way ahead. It even stopped to let the vehicles at the railway crossing pass (let alone other trains)!! We reached Madurai next morning... err ... noon.
Here began our Day 1 with delicious, home-cooked idlis, wadas and the best pongal ever! Followed by the ever refreshing filter coffee - perfect! Next highlight of the day was the drive from Madurai to Kodai – with John Denver and sometimes Presley crooning to us. We accompanied Farhan Akhtar with his “laundry ka bill” and “aadhi padhi novel” with our unmelodious “nana-na-na-na”. Gradually the landscape changed to a lush green valley on one side and mist-laden mountains on the other. It was a mirage of paradise. Then, I knew how it must feel to walk in the clouds...

The Greenland’s Youth hostel, where we stayed, gave a scenic view of the valley; the same as that from Coaker’s walk. For the rest of the day, we revelled in some cheese dim sums and masala chai.

Day 2 – We started off (sleepily) in the morning for a trek. Our guide happily took charge of clicking pictures of us and the beautiful valley. He showed us a peculiar type of flower and it’s four variants.. None of which we caught (no points for guessing why). But, when one of my friends (DB) exclaimed “potty flowers”; we were all ears. Apparently, those flowers grow in abundance in areas where cows or dogs potty! Rather interesting! Then followed a series of the usual - suicide points and echo points and waterfalls et al. All the while, the cloud cover played hide-n-seek with us... only sometimes giving us the opportunity to see the 2000 feet drop into nowhere! At the end of the day, we gladly soaked our somewhat sore feet in warm water and eucalyptus oil while we watched the Roddick and Federer battle.

Day 3 – Our wish list included buying loads of home-made chocolates, shopping, visiting the “Daily Bread”, shopping, cycling and boating and shopping some more :) ... and all this before 5 PM. And all this we did! We had booked tickets on a sleeper Volvo to Chennai for that evening. On boarding the bus we were disheartened to know that all our seats were on the left. This meant that the chance of sitting together and enjoying a game of cards was zilch! Eventually we resigned to our fate and to our bed to reach Chennai early next morning.

All in all, a perfect holiday!! :)

Moving on to better things... perhaps

Mumbai – my birth place and abode until now... There, I was used to watching the fiery sphere set into the golden waters, while I unwound with family or friends. In Chennai, I see the sun rising out of the waters. Life has come around a full circle in more than one ways.

A lot of parameters change when you go back to being a student from being an “earner”. Friday evenings are no longer reverberating with sounds of TGIFT; for there are assignments and pre-reads to complete and good chances of an assessment coming your way in the next five days. This is the transition phase from being an asset to becoming a liability. Cash inflow is NIL but an outflow sure exists! A month ago, spending 500 over a coffee or snack or 1000 over a dinner went almost unnoticed. Now, all expenditures are recorded and accounted for. Sigh... Hangovers from my Financial Accounting class yesterday.

Eight hour sleep (albeit, not in one stretch) used to be a luxury I enjoyed over the weekends then. Now, it seems like an alluring dream... priceless and coveted. I had almost fallen out of the habit of having coffee breaks at unruly hours at night; now it seems to be haunting me again. The only difference will be - then my mother made it for me (mostly); and now it will be me; making one for myself or many cuppas for all of us here... :)

Well, it ain’t all that bad... these are greener pastures with great opportunities leading to newer avenues. Some make the best of it, some sail through it and for some others it may be just a haze. I am determined to make the most, if not the best, of it. God speed to me...!

My first blog...

In my first blog, it would be appropriate to introduce myself. So here it is - name's Bhoomi, in my other life I am a software engineer. This nut loves to read and travel, goes bonkers over great food, writes occasionally (not done that since my other life took over!). Shoot-the-moon-wish is to be a restaurateur someday.. ha! Currently, I'm between a job and study. So, it's break time :)

That's enough "about me" for now. Why do I wish to blog.. well, I told someone I'd be posting updates on my life wherever I go on from here. And, of course, this takes me back to writing - albeit this blogging thing looks like a completely different ballgame.

So... while I make myself comfortable as a blogger, your comments/suggestions are welcome. Wait and watch this space for updates. Until then ... ADIOS!